ᴡʜᴇɴ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ sᴇᴇ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴇxᴘᴇᴄᴛ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ᴀɴᴅ ɪ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ᴛᴏ ʟɪᴠᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴛᴏ sᴏᴍᴇᴏɴᴇ's ᴇxᴘᴇᴄᴛᴀᴛɪᴏɴs.

[interpersonally]

WELCOME TO THE SALTBURNT NETWORK

USERNAME:
STEFAN

text ❖ audio ❖ video

(this inbox is a choose-not-to-warn experience, please read at your own discretion.)

Comments

[poppycock]

So convince him otherwise, if he’s speaking to you about this now. This is precisely why we have kept a low profile and relied on those we trust: to avoid unnecessary wolf hunts.

Katherine only wants to create a distraction influential enough to meet her ends. If I am accused, it will mean little against the strength of the other cases.

Best she rot in her own insignificance.

[highlyemotional]

[ kicks her way into this three way call like it's 2003. ]

I don't think you're a werewolf, well the capital W kind, because Katherine would be dead already, but "oh he would have murdered your source at the first chance" isn't exactly the best argument for you.

[poppycock]

( she knows him so well. his heart is a flutter. )

Actually, I would’ve killed Kai first.

( this is him flirting and not being at all helpful. )

[highlyemotional]

[ her lips purse grumpily, but there's little heat and she's glad neither of them can see her. ]

Well thank you, but Katherine would still be dead by now and this still doesn't give us anything to help your case.

[interpersonally]

Exactly. Her inclinations, while selfish, aren't wrong. She's dealing in facts we're keeping back. Neither of us believe you're a wolf, but can you give us anything to fan the flame she's stoking.

[poppycock]

That's simple. I'm a Doctor.

[highlyemotional]

[ her soft gasp is audible. ]

[poppycock]

I've convinced Tim, and what I assume is likely his most recent paramour Harry, to stand down. Should I be dead by the end of the week, remember me fondly.

[highlyemotional]

[ she snorts at "likely his most recent paramour." klaus' cunty behavior is a treat sometimes. ]

I'll kick his ass into next month if you are.

[interpersonally]

You'll have help, or at least a lookout. They really don't understand how to play this game. Why muddy the two clearer accusations with yours, when, like August's, it's all circumstance.

( If he could, he'd put him into a time out. )

[poppycock]

( he is inordinately pleased by their promised violence on his account. )

Because they are frightened. Because of Katherine. Or perhaps they are wolves. We'll find out soon enough.

[interpersonally]

( let's stick to voice, as Stefan addresses his device held to his mouth. )

My immediate questions are, were they burned alive or burned to cover up how they were killed. Which could point directly to the remaining wolves. And/or the alpha.

Katherine also dropped Tim's name. Between the religious overtone and the fire, she's not off base.

[interpersonally]

Katherine has made it clear she isn't voting Klaus down today, in the interest of self preservation. She's threatened if Klaus retaliates in any way - she will tear this commune apart. If that isn't a grand gesture for Katherine, but not worthy of being addressed until after all this?

( He appreciates her not gunning for Klaus so hard this time around. But, he already had an established detente back when Damon was still here. )

It's the smart play for her.

[poppycock]

Ah. ( that is a sound of some much-needed amusement. ) Well of course she's come crawling back with more promises and threats. We'll deal with her later.

[poppycock]

Who would like to assist me in building a bed? ( is this wry amusement? yes. is he joking? no. )

[highlyemotional]

[ laughing, ] I don't build things, but I'll read the directions for you.

[poppycock]

I don’t believe I’ll need any assistance in reading the directions. ( he’s looking at the stick figures locked in an embrace now ) They seem to imply at least two are needed, much like a tango.

[highlyemotional]

Sounds like this place.

[ she hums. ]

I guess I can rescue you.

[poppycock]

( klaus, who didn’t actually think that would work, specifically in caroline’s case, will just be sending her his room location. )

[interpersonally]

I'd offer my help, but really, I'd like to witness Klaus Mikaelson putting together an otherworldly Ikea bed.

( and it's stefan, so at a certain point in the process, he can definitely help. he was building furniture back home right before waking up here again. )

➡

[poppycock]

You're welcome to watch. Until you'd like to join, anyway.

( the invitation, thick with suggestion, is the last from klaus. inordinately pleased and filled with the warmth of excited anticipation, he does the honor of opening some of the boxes—easily, thankfully—with the abilities natural and due to him. he unloads the first, full of ornate wood, slats, and et cetera, and sets the pieces down in some semblance of order.

the instructions, however, do leave much to be desired, and he's pondering how exactly to begin (perhaps while studying the diagram from multiple angles) before he heaves a sigh, tosses it aside, and finishes his whiskey instead. )

[interpersonally]

( the invitation is playful, and reminds him of how he feels about caroline's girls. they are family. he ordered them drawers and he was going to put the beds together. now, he has another bed to put together, and he's up to the task.

he finds klaus as the instructions drop, the creased folds crunching as it flops against the ground.

it can't be that bad, right?

ignoring the whiskey for now, stefan sits down besides klaus, pulling the instructions toward him. he grabs both edges, not scrunching them up further )

This... looks doable.

( it kind of doesn't. but stefan's going to fake it until he makes it. )

[highlyemotional]

[ caroline lets herself a little while later, with a charcuterie board because the kitchens have been bored without anyone here and she was more than happy to provide them with something to do. she's got cheese and meats and tiny little pickles!

she pauses inside the door, head tilted, smile fond. ]

Hm, looks like someone did need assistance in reading the directions, huh?

[interpersonally]

They're not that legible.

( He says, turning them around. Maybe they're upside down? He picks up one of the pieces, comparing it to it's partner on the paper. )

Is this F-asterisk?

[poppycock]

This is why it's best to compel help. ( klaus, who has been mostly unhelpful since stefan arrived, is pouring another drink. he's not committed to being entirely unhelpful, which is why he's reaching for two other tumblers on his (thankfully) came-preassembled drink cart.

he hands one glass to stefan as he ponders over the instructions and walks the remaining glass to the caroline.

he isn't about to compel a passing butler or maid, however. instead, he graciously offers to trade the alcohol for the charcuterie board. he'll set it down somewhere appropriate. )